This is simply a story about a woman who thinks of all men as boys. Boys in bigger bodies.

In the first few drafts, I cut back and forth between Deirdre’s point of view and that of the young man, Randy.

I was quite fond of the story then, but it wasn’t getting the response I wanted from readers. Nobody really liked it, and I didn’t know why.

I needed to do something, but what?

Then, I don’t know why, I decided to present almost the entire story from Deirdre’s point of view, then again from Randy’s, finally bringing the two viewpoints together for the ending.

That did the trick.

Readers started saying it was my best story yet.

As I told the astute interviewer from Book Club Queen (who got me thinking about this story), I believe it’s because you get more uninterrupted time with each character, enough time to bond. And you naturally buy into the first point of view before finding out there’s more to the story. That change in perception makes it more interesting, I think.

To this day, more than 30 years later, I remember the instructor telling me where the story picked up interest for him, which was about a third of the way into what was then called “The Sinner and the Would-Be Savior.”

It was a painful but important lesson that helped to shape everything I’ve written since then.

In the years that followed, I rewrote the story several times, in the first person, third person, first person, third person. I could never seem to make up my mind which would be better.

As I began to gather my stories into a collection, “Just Admit It” was in, then out, then in again after one final round of changes.

In Precarious, the final version of “Just Admit It” is in the first person, but I suppose I could change it in a future edition. I could even go back to the original title, which I still like, even if it is a bit long.

Then again …

It’s a wonder I finished any of these stories.

When I wrote “What She Said,” I was working for a city magazine in San Francisco and the executive editor wanted to publish it. Her boss, as it turned out, did not.

Aaargh!

So I sent the story around to eight or nine other places. They all said no.

I gave up.

A decade later (give or take a couple years) I took another look at the story. It was lean and sharp and fast. I liked it. With a few small changes I sent it to the Beloit Fiction Journal. The editor at the time, Shawn Gillen, said yes.

Soon I had a work of fiction in print for the first time.

I’d be embarrassed to have anyone read the full manuscript now, so it remains hidden away. But I’m glad I didn’t simply burn it.

At some point I remembered that a friend said he really liked the chapter at the lake. So I took another look. It had potential.

The result is “Don’t Stop Now” (first published in Hobart and now part of my story collection, Precarious).

I think of it as the Reader’s Digest version of that first failed novel — a 342-page manuscript condensed to just 6 pages.

The first story, “Sleeping with Smiley,” began its life as a screenplay, and I chose the setting and the sport for their cinematic possibilities.

Later “Smiley” turned into a novel, back into a screenplay, then a novel again, and finally a short story, which is how I like it best.

Here’s a little glimpse of the screenplay:

FADE IN:

EXT. ROGUE RIVER — EARLY MORNING

All we see is the surface of the water, blue and calm, as the credits flash on and off the screen. Occasionally we hear the CRY of a seagull and see its shadow pass over the water. A fishing trawler CHUGGING out to sea can also be faintly heard.

As the last credit disappears there’s a brief silence, and then we see it: the narrow, pointed bow of a rowing shell glides into view, followed by the oars — two of them, close up, on the same side of the boat. They catch the water, not in unison but one slightly behind the other, and the boat lurches a bit.

The camera PULLS BACK and we stay with the boat as it moves along the river. The two scullers, the morning sun behind them now, are seen only in silhouette at first. The one nearer the bow is tall and lean; the other is several inches shorter but more muscular.

THE DOCK NEARBY

Standing on the edge is a massive man, bald except for a short white fringe. His name is WARREN ALT and he is dressed more like a gym teacher than the wealthy easterner he is.

THE TWO SCULLERS

are seen from over their shoulders. They really start pulling now, putting their backs into it, but their strokes don’t quite match.

The tall sculler notices the difference and shortens his stroke. Now the angle of his oars matches that of his shorter partner, and they start to glide, swiftly and smoothly, for the first time.

RESERVE ANGLE

We see the scullers faces as they continue to row in almost perfect synchronization. Setting the pace is 18-year-old CURT HUTTON, the shorter, more muscular one. When his face is not contorted with the strain of all-out rowing, he is exceptionally handsome.

Behind him is DEAN STOCKTON, who is also 18 and whose mature voice provides our narration. Although the muscles on his less-than-handsome face are slack, the pain still shows through.

ON THE DOCK

Mr. Alt paces slowly, following the boys’ progress. He stops, folds his arms, and nod appreciatively, but says nothing.

THE SHELL

continues to gain speed, and as it does, the expressions on the boys’ faces begin to change. We see a series of quick cuts — the bow cutting through the river … the splash of the oars as they catch the glassy water and pull … the boys’ seats sliding in the shell as they bend and straighten their knees — interspersed with close-ups of the boys as their eyes brighten, and smiles appear and grow on their faces.

When they finish the 20 power strokes, it’s as if they have crossed a finish line. Their oars come up and the shell continues to glide.

FAVORING CURT

as he looks over his shoulder at Dean and lets out a whoop.